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Health & Fitness

Disney is Right Where I Left It

My trip to Disney World was "Fat Guy Friendly."

I finally did it. I picked the perfect time to take the family down to Florida. Turns out it's in April. The weather was "Fat Guy Friendly" and the humidity was almost non-existent.

My kids are older so we didn't do a lot of the park hopping we use to do when they were young. Although we did make it to Downtown Disney and a trip to Disney Quest. Disney Quest is like an arcade on steroids. Filled with every video game and virtual reality game you can think of. You can even make your own roller-coaster and then get in the virtual reality coaster simulator (which will actually turn you upside down and side to side) and experience the ride you made.

Unfortunately, it's not fat guy friendly and after my daughter Dana and I had designed the coaster, alas, she was forced to ride it alone due to the safety bar not closing completely on me. The guy at the roller coaster felt sorry for me and gave us instant access to the "Pirates of the Caribbean" virtual reality ride which was a lot of fun. 

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This has inspired me to go on a "You can't even fit in a roller coaster anymore" diet. So if you see me around town with an ice cream cone in my hand, slap it out of my hands. My goal is to be thin enough to ride any roller-coaster until I throw up the diet food I've been eating. It would feel like poetic justice to me. It wouldn't feel so good to anyone behind me on the ride.

I've got my tan on too. I was able to take my shirt off and jump in the pool clearing out everyone who had entered the pool up until that point. Having the pool to myself has its perks, but it is a little lonely. I didn't try the tube slides at the resort, due to the crying children standing by the entrance of the slide saying "Please don't do it Mister, we all want to use the slide"! So I let them pass and went back to my reinforced chair. My tan resembles "Malibu Ken" without the six pack abs. 

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I still must say it's a pretty magical place. If you haven't brought your kids down there, try to save enough money to get down there and let them go nuts. The next time we go I'm going to the Magic Kingdom and their new feature "Get dressed up like the Princess of your choice". I think I'm going with Cinderella. I've always wanted to be a blond.

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